Life is a Mess

my life right now is a mess...

im clearing off and leave, but there's nothing much for me to do... tot could find 1-2 days kind of jobs to do, to kill time as well as to earn some cash, but cant find any yet... and i dont even know whether i will be able to clear my leave/off in peace, all the way till i ord... keep getting calls from ppl in camp asking me this and that... just feel so irritated...

i used to think that i should be ok studying accounts and finance... didnt seem too difficult when i first decided on it... now that i looked through some of the modules, i realised that it is not as simple as it seems... im now having doubts about my ability to cope with it... will it be a disaster just like my biotech? but i know no matter how hard it is, i will be able to do well, because im motivated, driven by a reason to do well...

i always thought that in order for me to forget someone is to fall in love with someone else, only then will i be able to let go off the past... but i realised that its not true at all... after the previous relationship, i fell in love with another girl, or so i thought... i thought that she will help me forget the previous relationship, but its not happening... for the past few weeks, i have been thinking if its because i still cant let go of the past, or she's not the one for me... i have been thinking if the best option for us now is to break out, since the time we have been together is not very long... but, its not fair to her as i was the one who wanted it in the first place... but no matter how much i try to think about it, try to come to a decision, i just cant find the answer to my problem... do u know that, if it was my previous gf, i couldnt stand not meeting her for 2 days... i even want to meet everyday if possible... but now, i dont feel anything if i dont meet her... i just dont have the urge to meet up or even call her... can someone please tell me whats wrong and what should i do? i dont want to do something in which i will regret in the future, but i just dont want to drag things on anymore... suddenly, single seems so nice........................................

all of a sudden, i wish i was suffering from amnesia... then i wouldnt have to think about or remember any of these problems... but running away from the problems doesnt seem to be my way of doing things does it?